Friday, August 3, 2012

Its not fair!!!! I feel cheated :-(

In total I have lost 8.4 pounds . I started logging into my fitness pal and I was two pounds lighter already. So from 19 days ago I have officially lost 6.4 pounds. Sadly my weigh in this morning was devastating to me. I waited all week to find out that I only lost a half of a pound. I feel cheated. I gave up all my favorite things, pizza, fries, cakes, cookies, and even diet soda, and I only lost  .8 ounces.  I even exercised, seriously that was a slap in the face. At that moment on the scale, it just didn't seem worth it. Wow that really made me mad. Other people eat and drink alot worse than I do and once they start eating and drinking better, the weigh magically drops off. Not me, I don't even like regular soda, and haven't drank it since I was very young. I don't like fast food, especially McDonald's. I must have been the only kid that would cry when I was told we were going there. Their food always made me sick. On average I make healthy choices most of the time, so I always question it, and say why me? I never get a straight answer ugh. I am still determined to lose this weight even if its only a 1/2 pound a week. However, if next week I don't lose any weight, I might give up. I'm hoping that doesn't happen.

At work today one of my coworkers brought me in chocolate covered pomegranates. She has been telling me about them for weeks. She actually dumped about 10 of them on my desk. I looked at them like she gave me heavy drugs. She said taste one, I said no , but she insisted . I told her that I haven't touched this kinda stuff in 18 days.The slogan is Say No to Drugs right? Well junk food is my drug, but I didn't say no.  She really wanted me to just taste one, so I did. To me the only taste was horrible guilt, like I hurt someone , and that someone was me. I focused and realized I ate the candy. Luckily I don't really like chocolate that much. However, even though I was upset about not losing more weight, I didn't punish myself, and  I didn't eat the rest of them, as I normally would have. I wrapped them up and put them away. I didn't totally lose my mind. I was really surprised with my self control. Someone else I work with is always very helpful. Talking over what just happened, and discussing other options about weight lose brought my focus back. This is the part of the lifestyle change when I usually throw in the towel, but not this time. After all I have been told that I'm 5ft of sunshine, and I have to live up to that positive motivational description, don't I? Never look back, keep moving forward.

“Around here, however, we don’t look backwards for very long. We keep moving forward, opening up new doors and doing new things… and curiosity keeps leading us down new paths.”–Walt Disney

To see what I ate log into and ask to be my friend. my user name is cerebral69.

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